Showing posts with label inner critic. Show all posts
Showing posts with label inner critic. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 31, 2016

Learning to Understand What You See

I had an aha! moment in my art journey recently. I was watching a video tutorial by Sycra, an illustrator who posts art instruction videos on YouTube. Sycra was describing the difference between drawing what you see and understanding what you see.




If you asked me if I knew that in order to create the illusion of a 3D form on flat paper that I had to be able to visualize the simplified 3D forms that make up that object, I would have nodded. Yes, of course I know that! 

Here's the aha! moment: I may have already known that, but it was while I was watching Sycra's video that I realized most of the time I wasn't actually doing it.

I dream up paintings and art pieces in my head all the time. Lack of ideas hasn't been the problem, lately. When I'm out in the world and struck by the way the morning light hits a tree or the way intricate shadows play on the sidewalk, everything has potential.

In my post on focused practice, I mentioned the struggle to get the beautiful scenes in my head or in front of my eyes out of imaginings and into physical reality in such a way that captures the moment and compels an emotional response in the people who see it.

Sometimes drawing what I want to draw the way I want to draw it gets overwhelming for me. You've heard the old adage: Stop and smell the roses.  Part of learning to see like an artist is really just taking the time to:


Stop and see the roses.

A red rose in bloom on the bush is not just red, it's also neon orange where the hot sun hits it, a translucent magenta where the light passes through the petals, and an inky merlot in the deep shadows where the petals meet and when it begins to wither and fade. There is a branching, almost fractal quality to the veining of each petal that is simultaneously a feat of engineering and the pulpy evidence of the biology of life. New abstract shapes are created in shadow every hour as the sun moves across the sky.


collage photo of red roses on a sunny day
garden roses
Julie Bazuzi (c)2016
When you really stop and see the roses, there is so much to see. So many shapes, so many colors, so much detail. 

It's too complicated. It's too hard. Where would I even start? I tip straight into the Land of Overwhelm and that impulse to reach for my sketchbook gets squashed before my hand even gets the message to start moving.


Oops, there's that inner critic again.


OK, so some good news: I noticed that inner critic voice showing up. No really, noticing that is what's happening is much better than just listening to those doubts and fears and giving up before I've even begun, right? 

Why? Because now that I've noticed, I have the power to make a choice. I can listen to that voice or I can listen to a different one, one that gives reassurance and encouragement instead. Sometimes I call this alternate voice my inner goddess of infinite compassion, but here let's call her our inner coach for short.


Alright inner coach, I'm ready for my pre-game pep talk!


Okay, when overwhelmed with uncertainty let's backtrack to what we know. I know that:

  • Drawing is a skill.
  • Skills are learned through study and improved through practice.
  • To draw what I see I need to understand what I see.
  • I need to simplify this complexity into generalized 3D forms.
  • After I understand what I see, I can add the detail later.

Here's my reference photo and my practice sketch. I started with a few overlapping circles and a small spiral at the center before feeling out the large shapes. I eliminated some of the innermost petals to simplify the flower. I used contour lines to force me to focus on the 3D forms of petal, leaf, stem, and bud. I indicated the direction of my light source to help me focus on what parts of the forms were facing the light and which were turned away or in shadow.

This is just stage one. It's not a finished drawing, but I do feel more confident! Stay tuned for stage two where I take this understanding and begin to add the details to bring these roses to life.


collage photo of rose next to a basic sketch of a rose on paper
work in progress: roses
Julie Bazuzi (c)2016


Wednesday, May 18, 2016

The Diva's Weekly Challenge #268: "A bit-o-black"

This week the Diva's Weekly Challenge is about creating more drama by adding more black than you normally would. I love challenges that push me out of my comfort zone. Those so often become my favorites works!


abstract black and white ink drawing with orange colored pencil gems using zentangle, tangle, nebel
Nebel with Gems
ink, colored pencil on paper
Julie Bazuzi (c)2016
This tangle started life as a few practice strokes on a scrap of paper and then miraculously evolved into a piece I really loved creating. This reminds me of some advice I picked up from an interview with painter Robert Burridge:


Always use good materials 
because you just never know when 
a great piece of art will appear!

He talks about using high quality paper even in his sketchbooks from 5:58 to roughly 7:55 if you want to skip right to it, but the whole interview is pretty interesting if you want to learn more about how a prolific artist generates and keeps track of ideas. He also shares his art-making knowledge very generously, which is how I first encountered his work.

The belief in using quality materials as a way of showing respect to your creative journey is also part of the Zentangle® philosophy, which is why the kits and accessories come with archival ink pens and tiles made of such fine paper.

I love, love, LOVE art supplies. I want to try everything when it comes to art. (Why, yes I did pin those DIY instructions for making a kiln in my backyard, thank you very much!) When I go into the art supply store, I want two of everything. And when I get a sale catalog from Utrecht in my mailbox, hold me back!

But sometimes I find it a challenge to justify spending the money on the good stuff when it comes to my art addiction, despite how passionate I am about learning more about making art and how good I feel when I've spent time doing it.

That's the inner critic showing up again.

And while I do need to pay attention to my budget, I also need to protect and nurture my creative spark if I want it to keep growing. So take that, inner critic! (insert karate chop here) I'm very glad that even though I was just experimenting on a "scrap" I was still using the best materials I currently have, and I love what I created.


Strathmore colored pencil sketchbook with Prismacolor 48 colored pencil set and Sakura Pigma Micron pen
Julie Bazuzi (c)2016


Thursday, May 12, 2016

Gaining Confidence through Accessible Art Practices -- The Zentangle Method

As a kid, I wrote stories and poems, I took dance classes, guitar lessons, and looked forward to art class with glee. I even had some minor recognition for my talents at times. At 8 years old, I was the youngest student from my school to be selected for a district-wide student writers workshop. At 10, my art teacher singled me out to take an advanced art class for youth at the local university. By the time I was "graduating" from elementary school, my teachers were signing my yearbook with things like, "I can't wait to read your first novel!" In high school I was encouraged to apply for (and then won) a competitive spot for creative writing in a summer boarding program for fine arts.

The thing is, at the time I never felt like I really lived up to the expectations of those enthusiastic and encouraging adults. Or rather, I never really lived up to the expectations I created for myself in the wake of their enthusiasm and encouragement. 

When on-the-spot creativity was required (You have 15 minutes to write a dialogue between two characters of your own creation which other students in class will perform, starting... now!) I blanked completely. 

And being a very sensitive soul, every perceived lack in my achievements became magnified into enormous failures. It was a self-reinforcing cycle. 


I lost my artistic confidence 
and I gave up creative writing and fine art 
for a long, long time.

Time passed, as it does.

There was college, and marriage, a career, and children. I became a graduate, a software tester, a mother, a homeschooler. But in that time, I never became an artist.

As I watched my children follow their curiosity and their hearts, learn to walk, talk, draw, write, swim, ride bikes, I cherished their fearlessness.

I began to grieve some of those lost opportunities from my own youth. I considered those artistic paths I hadn't followed out of loss of confidence, a fear of failure, and I wondered...


what if?

Enter Zentangle®, stage left.


black and white abstract drawing with color gems in ink on paper using diva dance and finery tangles in zentangle style
Early Gems
Julie Bazuzi (c)2016


Much has been written about the Zentangle artform, and I encourage you start at the source and read directly about The Zentangle Method, from the creators Maria Thomas and Rick Roberts.

The thing that drew me in, not just to admire the finished artworks created by others but to actually try it myself, was the philosophy:

Anything is possible, one stroke at a time.
- Rick Roberts & Maria Thomas

Incredibly ornate and intricate pieces of Zentangle art are created by deconstructing patterns into bite-size pieces. By distilling these patterns or "tangles" into simple, focused, and repetitive strokes, almost anyone can access not only this artform but also a soothing meditative state of mind.

Immediately I dug out an old sketchbook, previously abandoned for several years, and began filling pages the with tangles. I learned tangles from the Zentangle website and online communities generously sharing the step-outs to patterns they had learned directly from Rick and Maria, from each other, or created themselves.

sketchbook with black and whhite abstract drawing, patterns, tangles in zentangle style
sketchbook tangle practice
Julie Bazuzi (c)2016

You may have noticed that tangles are done in pen. That's right, because there are no erasers in The Zentangle Method. Why?


~ there are no mistakes ~


There are no mistakes because there are no pre-determined outcomes in this approach, only opportunities for new exploration. If your line wiggles, breaks, or heads off course, that is your stamp of authenticity. 


HERE LIES
original one of a kind artwork
that could only be made by 
YOU

If a "stray" line or dot appears, perhaps it's an invitation to add stippling, thicken the line weight, or add shading. One unintended or wiggly line can seem like a mistake when our inner critic starts talking. Repeated over and over again, that wiggly line is a unique rendering that takes on a life of it's own.


Just stop for a second and let yourself appreciate 
how freeing that idea is.


tan sketchbook paper with abstract drawing in white and metallic gel pen using auras in the zentangle style
Wild Auras
Julie Bazuzi (c) 2016





The Zentangle® Method is an easy-to-learn, relaxing, and fun way to create beautiful images by drawing structured patterns. It was created by Rick Roberts and Maria Thomas. "Zentangle" is a registered trademark of Zentangle, Inc. Learn more at zentangle.com